I have failed you too many times to count. I have betrayed you, turned my back on you, left you stranded in the middle of the road, the road where you only came to greet me and shower me with love. I abandoned your love in search of other things I thought would satisfy me. You have given me so much in this life, yet so often I toss it all to the side, thinking that there's something much better in store for me up ahead. So on I go, seeking after that "something" up ahead, only to find that all I wanted was you all along.
I'm going to be honest with all of my readers tonight, my dear sweet Jesus. Tonight I will be vulnerable with all of them, and I pray that you give me the courage to do just that. I need to be honest: I have failed to love you and your people well. I'm so wrapped up in my own selfish desires that I can't think of anything else besides what is best for me and what will make me happy. Yet striving to make myself happy has only made me less happy.
Because you see, this life is not about me. This life is about you. This life is about others.
And the fact that you can forgive me for failing to realize this in the past is the most beautiful news I've heard all day. The fact that you can forgive me, itty bitty imperfect me, is outrageous and wonderful all at the same time.
You're love never fails and never gives up and never runs out on me.*
Even if the people in my life are disappointed with me or hate me or never speak to me again, YOU will always love me. You will wrap your loving arms around me everyday for the rest of my life.
So even if I lose everything I have ever had in my entire life, my friends, my family, my education, my talents, my money, my house, anything…I still have you. You are what I need in this life. You are my everything. You are my eternal love.
When oceans rise, my soul will rest in your embrace, for I am yours and you are mine.**
You are mine, Jesus. You are mine.
How sweet it is to be loved by you.