Special; Beautiful; Blemished

It's an odd thing, growing up.
One minute you're wrapped in your mother's arms, talking and sharing stories about life and love.
The next minute you're soaring miles and miles above those arms and everything you've ever known.
On a plane, above the clouds, away from home.
Before you know it, your surroundings are new, your people are new, your own self is new.
But in a way the "new" is good.
It's better, almost.
And somehow you emerge stronger, taller, wiser than before.
And the ones at home greet you with a, "My my look at you now!" or a "I always knew you had it in you!"

And for the very first time in your sweet short life you're able to look in that mirror, with that smile, and that face, and that body, and think to yourself, "They're right. I am something special."
So you live and you learn and you grow and you know - know with every fiber of your being - that your fibers and your being are filled with meaning.
And every part of you, the good, the bad, the beauty, the blemishes - the moments of triumph and the moments of the worst kind of brokenness you've ever known - each of these moments are needed.
Because, after all, these moments have made you "you" - special, beautiful, blemished you.
And if even a moment of yesterday was different, the "you" today would be changed entirely.

This life is a grand collection of moments, and memories, and misguided choices - an intricate mix of these essential three, and one or two simply won't suffice.
For without these moments, these memories, these misguided choices, perhaps you wouldn't be the all-star package of special, beautiful, blemished - the greatest three a person can be.
You see, we need special moments to make us special, beautiful memories to makes us beautiful, and blemished, misguided choices to make us specially, beautifully, wonderfully blemished.
And so we return, back to our mother's arms and the world we've always known, with a, "My my my look at you now!" or a "I always knew you had it in you all along!"

We emerge with that newness of life, that sweet sense of freedom and belonging.
And finally, finally, finally we see that we do belong and we are free in a special, beautiful, blemished world full of special, beautiful, blemished people.
We emerge brand new.
We live; we learn; we grow; we know.
We carry on our way, each time returning more special, more beautiful, more wonderfully blemished than ever before.


Sweet Jesus, I love You for giving me imperfections. The imperfections have built me, shaped me, made me into the person I am today. I embrace imperfection; I welcome vulnerability. Because I know that in my imperfection, Your perfection is revealed. You say to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me (2 Corinthians 12:9). You make me special. You make me beautiful. You make me specially, beautifully, wonderfully blemished. I am content with who I am, but at the same time, I am striving and yearning and longing to be the girl you created me to be. All in all, no matter at which point of my striving and yearning and longing I am, no matter where I find myself in life, I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

"I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Your works are WONDERFUL.
I know that full well."
[Psalm 139:14]


  1. This is a beautiful post, Haley. Very thought provoking and heartfelt. (but what's new?) You don't know me all too well, but I just wanted to take the time to say you ARE indeed quite special, and I am so proud of all that you have accomplished.

    You continue to inspire so many around you, and I wanted to let you know it does not go unnoticed. You are a gift!

    1. Thank you so very much! It's always good to get positive feedback.


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